In which I pacify myself to continue on writing despite the blunders.

In which I pacify myself to never stop trying despite the blunders.

If there’s one thing I’m completely envious with some bloggers is their ability to express their thoughts so eloquently. One of the main reasons why I insisted on blogging despite my obvious lack of writing talent is to acquire that skill. But I’ve been doing this for quite some time and while I do think I improved *coughs* diminutive progress *coughs* but I’m nowhere where I want to be & often reasoned that it’s not my mother tongue (I think this reason is starting to wear thin). LOL I still write the same & still not evidently conscious on how I sort out my thoughts—whether it is properly convey or not.

I want to have a distinct voice & style (and not to be known as this person who commits mistakes on a regular basis—though for now that’s my situation). I do not aspire to be like Juliette (of Shatter Me). I don’t think pretty sentences are my aesthetic anyways, plus excessive use of metaphors can take away the real thought; as it sometime strips its literal meaning (at least to me).

Honestly, I don’t think I pay attention too much on how grammar works *put down those pitch forks grammar nazis* I know it’s important to use a language on how it is properly use but the method of memorizing the nooks & corner is not suited for me. I’m that kind of learner who needs to be exposed, pick up interesting/important points then apply (even though I’m not sure if I used correctly. I’d like to gamble, haha.) Perhaps it might sound a daunting process but I prefer it this way. The academic approach is bound to be forgotten. My mind works differently I supposed.

You know, sometimes I still wonder how I learned to code. But I think the reason is I never failed to use it. I keep doing it again and again that it naturally absorbed by my brain. Aren’t HTML, CSS languages? I even like reading manga in raw (Japanese text), type the dialogues & look up each meaning, even though it may take a while for me to translate it (if worst come to worst I holler my sister for help). But the sense of achievement over what it seems such a small task to some is worth reveling for.

But I digress, the whole point of this post is a friendly reminder to myself to keep it up; despite the embarrassing stumbles along the way, if I keep myself optimistic about it then maybe I’ll able to write something I’ll be proud of. Isn’t also important is to express yourself sincerely? So for now, I’m holding on to the thought, so please bear the inconsistencies. I trusted people’s words about learning: it never stops. And I’ll never stop!

I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.
— Pablo Picasso